Liam at 3 Weeks

Failure at ZAGS

Well, we were not able to get Liam's birth certificate yesterday.

It turns out that we need our marriage certificate to be "apostilled."  Basically that means we need an original copy with an internationally recognized notary.  In order to get this Beth's mother will have to go to the same courthouse that we received the certificate in Georiga, and not only get another certificate but have it apostilled and rushed to Moscow. 

We hope to have all of this finished and his birth certificate in hand by July 9.  If it's a month after his birth there will be slight fine, but it's good to know that there is no major rush.

Liam Doesn't Exist Yet -- Legally Speaking

Yep.  As of right now, Liam does not exist in any sort of legal status.  The only current information about Liam is a sheet of paper stating that Beth Rhodes gave birth to him on June 9.  He has no name, and I'm not mentioned in anything.

But tomorrow, everything will change.

In order to get Liam's birth certificate, tomorrow we will have to go to the записи актов
гражданского состояния, or ЗАГС (ZAGS), the civil registry of Russia.  We most not only bring our passports but also our marriage certificate, and the previously mentioned paper we received from the hospital.  We still are not sure yet if we need to bring Liam, but we hope to find out tomorrow before leaving.  Our best guess is that it's going to be a long day.

And we do all of this to receive Liam's Russian birth certificate-- only then can we go to the American Embassy and get his American citizenship worked out.  Right now we're also looking into dual citizenship.  We've heard both that he will and won't be able to, so we'll hopefully find out a definite answer  tomorrow.  But how cool would it be if he could have a dual?

We'll let you know how things go!

Liam at 2 Weeks

Liam at 1 Week

Liam's Birthday

We went in for a check up on Tuesday the 8^th.  The doctor said that there were still no signs that the baby was going to come in to the world on his own and she wanted to start the induction process.  She sent us to the first floor to check into labor and delivery.  As soon as I got there I was surrounded by a troop of Russian nurses, each with a job.  They took my blood pressure, felt my stomach, measured me, weighed me, felt my ankles, asked millions of questions, took my clothes, showered me, and dressed me in a gown and robe.  I felt like I was in a whirlwind and didn’t understand anything going on.  But finally I was ready and they admitted me to the hospital and took me to my room. 

The induction process my doctor wanted to use was a slow process.  She started Tuesday evening with a preparatory procedure…I was then supposed to sleep through the night and then they would start medication in the morning.  Tim and my mom stayed with me until about 11 that night and then they had to go home.  I slept like a baby until the nurse woke me up the next morning. 

About nine o’clock Wednesday morning they gave medication to start labor.  Tim and my mom arrived five minutes after this and contractions began soon after.  By 11 o’clock they were rolling me to the delivery room.  Tim had to go downstairs to get scrubbed in and suited up.  I was in the delivery room for about 30 minutes waiting for him…getting a little desperate…I was so glad when he finally arrived.  I sent him right out to ask the nurse when I could get my epidural.  By noon the anesthesiologist was in my room giving me my epidural and I couldn’t wait!  He told me, “five minutes and no more pain.”  However, fifteen minutes later one of my legs felt a little tingly…but not quite the pain relief I was expecting.  I told the nurse and the anesthesiologist came back and upped my dose.  My other leg felt a little tingly…but my pain was increasing by a lot!  I told the nurse again that I was still feeling pain.  The anesthesiologist returned and after chatting with the nurse for a moment…decided to redo my epidural.  He pulled the first one out of my back and put a new one in a few vertebras higher.  Then he gave me twice the dose.  Five minutes later I was feeling nothing…my lips were even numb.  I guess due to the fact I couldn’t feel anything I stopped breathing as well as I should, and the baby’s heart rate started dropping.  A small army of nurses came into my room and yelled at me to breathe.  I had to really focus and breathe…but his heart rate stabilized.  This was about 2 o’clock in the afternoon.

I napped for a while and Tim and I talked.  I was thinking that this labor thing wasn’t so bad.  We were incredibly surprised when around five o’clock my doctor came in and told us it was time to turn the epidural off.     I told her no…and asked why!  She told me they must because I had to be able to feel to push.  I was confused because I know a lot of women in America who have not felt anything and been perfectly able to push.  For about the next two hours…I got the full natural birth experience.  I really thought I might die.  I also glared at my doctor constantly.  Only the fact that I needed her then kept me from telling her exactly how I felt about her.  If you have spent any time in Moscow you know that Russians are crazy about their cell phones and answer them whenever they ring.  You can always hear stories about teachers answering calls during a lecture, bank tellers in the middle of your transaction, or waiters while you are ordering.  This cultural trend is also true for doctors while you are in labor.  At least six times during the final part of my labor, my doctor’s phone rang and she would leave the room.  One time she told me that the next contraction we would push…however, right as the contraction started she got a call and left.  I told Tim I was going to push anyway…but he talked me out of it.  Finally at 6:53 William Soren Rhodes was born.  They washed him right there and wrapped him up and Tim was able to spend the next hour or so walking with him and talking to him.  I was not so lucky.  The doctor needed to fix me up…so they called the anesthesiologist back.  He gave me what he called a super epidural…he said I wouldn’t be able to feel my legs at all or be able to walk for at least 2 hours.  However, when the doctor came back in a few minutes later I quickly informed her that I could feel everything and wiggled my toes for her.  She promptly took a needle and poked me with it.  I yelled and told her that it hurt…she asked if it was pain or pressure.  I informed her it felt like she just poked me with a needle.  The anesthesiologist came back and gave me something else.  An hour later I started coming to.  Tim kept talking to me…but I couldn’t really understand or respond to him.  I could just look at him and our son.  It didn’t matter what I was feeling…seeing them together was pure joy.  About 2 hours after Liam was born we were able to go to our room.  My mom and our friend Andrea joined us in the room and we ate dinner.  I couldn’t stop looking at Liam.  He was perfect and it started to sink in that I was his mother. 

Liam's Homecoming

On Saturday, Beth and Liam came home from the hospital.

It's Liam!

On June 9, 2010, at 6:53 p.m. Moscow time, William Soren Rhodes was born.


He weighed in at 3.8 kilos (8.3 pounds), and was 55 centimeters (22 inches) long.

Liam's Digs

Here are some shots of Liam's little corner of our bedroom.

Dr. Elena

My Russian doctor is very sweet…she is probably in her 40s with bleached blonde hair and usually has a big bow on the side of her head. Her English was good…but sometimes the way she would explain things were a little difficult to understand…but it is better than Russian! Even though the hospital was very modern and my doctor was very professional…there were still a few things that were a little different. First rather than a stethoscope she would listen to the baby’s heart beat through a little wooden cone shaped thing. Also…every week she would get on to me for drinking too much water because my feet would be a little swollen. One week she even told me I should stop drinking water all together, that I would get enough from fruits and vegetables. I was a bad patient and kept drinking water…because I had rather have puffy feet than be dehydrated.

Learning the System

I started going in for weekly appointments at the Russian hospital. It was another learning experience to figure out this new system. When entering the hospital you had to give security your name and a reason for being there. Then you had to put on the infamous blue plastic booties over your shoes. Many places in Moscow require you to wear these booties inside…it keeps things cleaner…however, they are like little foot saunas and you sound like an army walking down a quiet hall. After getting all decked out in the booties you head upstairs to one window where you tell the lady what you need that day. They doctor gives you a check list of things to do before your appointment. Usually I order one doctor’s check-up, one ultra-sound and one ktg (baby heart monitoring). But you may also have to order certain lab test or other screenings. She then writes out little forms for each of the things you need. Then you take your order forms to another window where you must pay for each thing. Then she stamps the order forms and they are valid. Then you go to the different offices… where you give the nurse your order form and are called in when it is your turn. They each give you a report…which you compile and then give everything to your doctor when it is finally time for your check-up.

The Hospital

I was able to continue getting prenatal care at the international clinic until the last month of my pregnancy. At this point I had to be referred to a Russian doctor. Foreigners are not allowed to deliver babies. My doctor gave me a referral to a Russian doctor who spoke some English at the perinatal hospital here in Moscow. This is a new hospital and has a reputation for being really good. We went in for a tour of the hospital. You then had to choose a package option and sign a contract with the hospital. The 3 package options that they offered were the standard package, one private room and bathroom for the mother. Then there was the deluxe package, which was a room for the mother and a room for the baby. The baby’s room was fully furnished and looked professionally decorated. Then there was the VIP package which included the mother’s room, the baby’s room, and the Father’s room. The father’s room included a few couches and a huge flat screen tv. It also had 2 full bathrooms and a full time nurse who would sit outside your room 24 hours a day waiting for you to buzz her. Tim was really tempted by the big screen tv…but on hearing the $20,000 price tag…we decided that we REALLY liked the standard room. We decided on the most basic package and they drew up the contract. However, we ran into trouble trying to pay. Even though we had money in our account…the bank froze our cards because of the large amount we were trying to charge. This was a Friday afternoon…we were able to sign a promissory note that kept the contract valid for 3 days. Without a valid contract…if I went into labor…we would not be admitted. Being 8 and a half months pregnant…this made us a little nervous. We ran home to call the bank to try to get everything situated. After talking to 3 different people we were told there was nothing that could be done until the main office opened on Monday morning at 9 am. 9 am in America is 5 pm here…and the contract had to be paid for by 6 pm on Monday or we were looking at a forced home birth. Since the hospital is about 30 minutes away…Tim left our apartment at 4:30 on Monday with our bank card…and I got on skype to call in at 5 on the button. Thankfully I was able to finally reach someone who could actually help us and she unblocked the card for 1 hour. I called Tim on his mobile where he was waiting at the hospital…and he was able to pay and have everything settled by 5:45…just in time! Having the contract in hand took a huge load off!

Sergey

One of the main differences in the medical care here I have discovered from talking to friends is ultrasounds. Most of my American friends had 2-3 ultrasounds during their pregnancy. During my 9 month pregnancy in Moscow I have had 11 ultrasounds. I don’t know if this is healthy, but I did enjoy being able to see the baby so often and watching him grow. However, getting the ultrasound was always kind of nerve wracking. This was due to our ultrasound tech, Sergey. Sergey is blond haired, blue eyed, about 6 and a half feet tall and big. He looks like someone you would see in a movie as a mafia hit man…or a Nazi officer. Sergey never smiled and I only heard him speak 5 words. While having an ultra sound done…Sergey would glare at the baby’s image on the screen while he clicked on the computer…he would grunt and sigh as he measured the baby and listened to the heartbeat. Many times I was convinced that something was dreadfully wrong with the baby, it took awhile for us to realize that it was just Sergey’s way. At our 5 month appointment I summoned the courage to ask Sergey if he could tell the gender. He said yes and then grunted a word. Tim and I looked at each other, confused. I thought Sergey said boy, Tim thought girl. But neither of us really wanted to ask him to repeat himself. Thankfully a minute later Sergey pointed to the screen and Tim and I were thrilled to see we were having a BOY!

The First Trimester

I felt great for about the next three days…and then the morning sickness started.  It was bad…and not just in the morning.  I was hardly able to keep any food down.  I spent October, November and December feeling like I might die.  I was nauseous, and so weak that I could barely walk to the bathroom at times.  Leaving the apartment was an ordeal…Moscow is a city of many smells and I had never been more aware of them.  I remember vividly taking the metro to a doctor’s appointment.  I found an empty seat and flopped down.  The first breath I took I started gagging.  The man next to me smelled like vodka, fish and body odor.  It took everything within me to not get sick on that train.  

During this time not only did I feel bad physically, but emotionally I was frustruated.  There were so many things that I wanted and needed to do.  I felt like such a waste living in another country and not being able to get out of bed some days.  I had to learn to let go of control.  It was hard really learning that I didn’t have control of my circumstances, the world around me or even my own body.  It was a hard lesson to learn…and one that would be repeated over and over during this pregnancy. 

About a week before Christmas I woke up not feeling as bad as usual.  I declared that morning sickness was over and that we needed to go Christmas shopping.  Tim and I invited a couple of our friends to go with us to a big mall a little ways outside of the city.  We took the metro about 15 minutes to where we could catch the bus.  We got on the always crowded bus out to the mall, and found a place to stand.  About 5 minutes into the ride…I started feeling lightheaded.  I told Tim I wasn’t feeling well…he assumed it was the usual and started looking for a bag.  By that point I couldn’t tell him that wasn’t the problem.  I just held on to the bar in front of me and focused on staying conscious.  Then everything went dark and I felt peaceful .  I woke up about 30 seconds later on the floor of the bus with about 50 Russian faces all looking down at me.  Tim thankfully had caught me on my way down and was franticly calling my name.  It took me awhile to recognize where I was and what was going on.  Tim was finally able to stand me up and someone gave me a seat.  Everyone on the bus stared at me for the rest of the trip…probably thinking I had swine flu. 

The Beginning

On October 4^th 2009 Tim finally convinced me to take a pregnancy test…I had assured him many times that there was no possible way I could be pregnant.  We went to the local store and found what we were pretty sure was a pregnancy test and I went to prove Tim wrong.  Almost immediately two lines appeared…but we had no idea what that meant.  We pulled out the instructions and carefully began to translate them.  I was shocked when Tim carefully translated that two lines is pregnant.  We both looked at each other in shock.  However, we decided that the test was probably wrong…it was Russian and was likely defective.  I set up an appointment at the international clinic for the next day, just in case. 

We walked into the clinic and first thing they sent me in for an ultrasound.  The technician spoke no English and said nothing as she clicked on her computer and grunted.  She printed off some things and I was sent in to see the Doctor.  The Doctor was a very nice middle eastern woman who spoke amazing English.  She introduced herself and told me everything looked good.  I finally had to ask…”so am I pregnant?”  “Without a doubt, about a month,” she answered.    Tim and I walked around in a daze for days.  This was not something that fit into our plans and all we could think of was how much things would have to change.  I told Tim that living in another country was an adventure…but I didn’t sign up to have our first baby here…that was something you did in the comfort of your own country, surrounded by friends and family.  It took us awhile, but we slowly warmed to the idea and got excited about being parents and having a little baby to love.  We had to let go of our ideas about how things should be and trust God to lead us in this new adventure. 

Waiting!

There were many differences between being pregnant in  Moscow and in America, some were good, some bad and most…just different.  We don’t have a car here…so walking, and public transportation are part of our daily life.  Also, the majority of my pregnancy was spent in subfreezing temperatures.  Having to bundle up and slide around on the snow and ice everyday made life more interesting, especially with a changing center of gravity.  Even going to doctor’s appointments involved a 30 minute metro ride and a 30 minute walk each way…which was especially difficult at my January appointment when it was 20 degrees below zero.  Being pregnant here in Moscow has been difficult…some days I feel like a martyr, some days like wonder woman and some days it is just life.